The joy of being a kid.

Aaaaaaaaa I'm so frustrated with the quality of my camera. Can't wait 'til I can get a new one. Anyways Natalie's soccer season is over and to celebrate the team got together at the splash pad.

The girls had a wonderful time. I can't believe how attached we've become to these girls. We're really going to miss the team.

I'm not too sentimental but for some reason as I stood there watching my little girl run into the water and splash and giggle I got a knot in my throat and my eyes got watery.

I looked at her and all this feelings came flooding in my mind and heart. I looked at her and thought about all the years I wasn't really there for. I was working so hard and pretty much sacrificed 4 years of her life. The most important years of her life. I missed her being a little girl, and even when I was finally with her it felt like I really wasn't there. Like I was always pushing for her to be independent, to grow up so fast. And now here she was almost 9 years old. 3 more years and she'll be in Young Womans. Yet here she was, running, gigging, jumping like the little girl that she still is.

I loved watching her still embrace her little girl inside. I felt guilty that Jaimito was having me in his life, I'm getting to enjoy him. He's getting what Natalie didn't get.

I also felt joy. In these times where a 9 year old is so advanced. Where a 9 year old is too cool or big to run around in a splash pad, here was my little girl doing exactly that. I felt tears coming for the simple fact that I felt blessed to be there being able to enjoy this moment. This blessing which I was cherishing. I wanted to save this moment forever in my mind and heart.

And even now as I write this post I can't help but feel nolstalgic about it. In the rush of things, the everyday squedule, the stressed times, the work, and everything else, we just don't truly savor our kids. We then find ourselves like this, wishing we could freeze time or even turn back time to when they were just babies!